As baby O and Z grew I fell in love with them more everyday. I enjoyed every moment with them.
At the beginning of the 4th year we decided to purchase a plot of land next door to us that consisted of 18 acres. We had big plans, dog kennels, orchards, animals and so much more. The property was to go in both of our names because I was going to help pay for it with the dog money I was making and because I was eventually going to put a building on it.
At this time Hell and I were getting along. I had a goal in mind to keep me focused, it was all we talked about. That made me happy. We paid the owner by e-transfer every month. I would send Hell money anytime I would get it and give him cash from a sale of a puppy.
Hell and I would go visit his aunt some weekends with the kids. Hell was very direct, which isn’t a problem until you start being an asshole about it. He was saying to his aunt that he would ‘pay no bitch that leaves him’. He was talking about how if his dad doesn’t do as he says that he’s being kicked to the curb, when I went to defend my father in-law Hell looked at me and said I would be next.
I wanted to make my dog business official and start claiming it. Once again…. Hell convinced me it wasn’t a good idea. He said I would have to go through so many steps that I would pass and that I would lose 50% of what I made because of joint income of being common law. At this point I was so wrapped around his finger I was doing what ever he said.
I was starting to get really down in the dumps at this point. One day an old friend reached out to me from high school. We met up for an hour or so and chatted. We continued chatting. We started getting an attachment to one another. I was having an emotional affair. It felt so incredibly wrong but it kept me sane. I was able to tell someone everything that was going on who had no involvement.
That night I called my friend and she picked me up with some of my stuff. She unfortunately only had room for one of my children so we were going to return to pick up the other one. Before I had time to go back I was contacted by the police to not return to the house.
Eventually Hell found out and asked me to stop. For some reason this was the first time I didn’t really listen to him. I went behind his back and kept talking to him. When Hell found out he gave me an ultimatum to either stop talking to him or get out of his house. I took this opportunity to get away from Hell.
When Hell found out he ‘got laid off’ from work. I put that in quotes because he asked his boss to lay him off. The company lied and said there was a lack of work.. in the middle of peak season. This was another way to beat the system.
After leaving the farm I ended up living with Hells aunt in a city approximately 30 minutes away. She knew what sort of person Hell was, so understood completely why I left. I considered her my own aunt, I came to her anytime there was something wrong. I also helped her in Wednesday’s for an art class for kids for the last couple of years of living at the farm.
For the next week or so I would go to the farm for the boys to see each other and for me to see baby O. It was the hardest thing I have ever done. I was with my boys 24/7. When I would leave the farm Hell would tell baby O that I didn’t want to be with him anymore as he cried watching me leave.
My life 